


teleport into my heart

by Dresupi



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe, Thor (Movies)
Genre: BAMF Darcy Lewis, Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Crossover, Crossover Pairings, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Darcy Lewis is the fandom bicycle and I love it, Dubious Science, F/M, Fake Science, First Meetings, Long-Distance Relationship, Online Relationship, Online Romance, POV Spencer Reid, SHIP DARCY LEWIS WITH ALL THE THINGS, Teleportation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-03
Packaged: 2019-04-18 02:45:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14203347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Dresupi/pseuds/Dresupi
Summary: Tony messes with the settings on Darcy's taser again. Not only does it backfire, and frizz her hair beyond all help, but it also kind of teleports her to other places now.With mega bad hair.Which is how she ended up in the middle of the BAU in the FBI building and sort of under arrest, but not really.





	teleport into my heart

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thestanceyg](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thestanceyg/gifts).



> Day 3 : Taser Mishaps
> 
> For: thestanceyg, who turned me onto this ship.

“Why am I needed in the interrogation room?” Spencer asked. “Is there a case?”

Neither of the agents flanking him were very talkative, but he could tell from their demeanor that something unusual was going on. Which was backed up by the BAU being in complete lockdown and no one being allowed to go to their desks.

They took him into the room, on the opposite side of the one-way mirror to the person being interrogated.  

She looked different than he remembered, but then again, he’d only ever seen her Facebook photo. As he understood it, people used the most flattering photos they could find of themselves for their social media avatars. 

But even with the incredibly frizzy hair and too big sweater, she was still very recognizable.  

“Darcy?” he muttered under his breath. “Why is  _ Darcy _ here?”  

He thought he sensed a shift in the room. “We thought you could answer that for us? She showed up in the middle of the BAU floor at three am this morning.”  

“How’d she get in?” Spencer asked, tilting his head to the side and studying the woman on the other side of the glass. She gave the outward appearance of being calm, but he could tell she wasn’t. She was bouncing her leg under the table, her eyes were flitting around at every sound.  She didn’t look like she could sneak into a government building. If his online interactions with her were of any indication, she didn’t  _ seem _ like she would either.  

“She just appeared.”  

“What, like out of thin air?” Spencer frowned. 

“Yes. Exactly that. We have the surveillance footage.”  

“I’ll look at it later, can I speak with her?”  

The agent nodded, gesturing with her hand towards the door.  

Spencer moved towards the door, leaving the room and turning towards the other door, the one that opened into the actual interrogation room.  

When he entered the room, she practically collapsed in relief. “Oh my Thor, thank you, thank you, thank you…”  

Spencer couldn’t help but crack a small smile at that. “Hi, Darcy.”  

“Spencer. Dude,  _ listen _ … don’t freak out, okay?”  

“It’s kind of hard not to freak out when a girl you’re  _ sort of _ dating online shows up in the middle of your workplace… especially since I never told you where I work…”  

“Yeah, listen. It’s not what it looks like, I promise.”  

“Apparently not, I was told you… appeared? Out of thin air?”  

“Okay, so you’re not the only one who works for a top secret government administration, okay, Spence?”  

“Who do you work for?”  

“S.H.I.E.L.D. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to tell you that, or not… but I was put under arrest this morning and I’m just blabbing to whoever will listen because that was some scary ass shit and I do NOT want to go to federal prison, okay?”  

“You’re a S.H.I.E.L.D agent?”  he asked, a bit bewildered that the woman with frizzy hair sitting in front of him could have passed any kind of agent training.  

“A liason.I work in HR. Kind of.” She shrugged. “I never had field training, okay?  I just… I work with Tony Stark, I do PR for the Avengers, and I kind of let my boss tinker with my taser a few months ago.”  

Spencer was pretty sure his confusion was showing on his face, because he had no clue what she was talking about. Tony Stark? Did she say the Avengers? What was--

“Anywho, Tony tinkered, and I hadn’t used it until last night, I was walking home and some creep grabbed my arm, so I shot him with my taser and then I ended up here. Tony had the taser linked to my social media so like… if it went off, it would put out a notification on all my accounts with like… my whereabouts. The only thing I can think of, is that some wires got crossed and instead of doing what it was supposed to do, it sent me to the whereabouts of the last person I talked to…”  She gestured around vaguely. “We did just finish talking at like… ten p.m last night…” 

Spencer blinked. “Someone assaulted you?”  

“That’s what you took from that?” she asked, her hand moving up into her hair to push it back from her face. “And… geez, my hair isn’t made for teleportation… it doesn’t normally look like this, I promise!”  

“It looks fine…” he said absently.  “But… I don’t know how much of this is really believable, Darcy… I mean…  _ I _ believe you, but it’s going to have to be more than me or--”  

As if on cue, there was a sharp knock on the door and it banged open a second later.  

None other than Tony Stark himself stood there, tugging down the sleeves of his suit coat as he strolled in. “C’mon kid, kiss your boyfriend bye-bye, we’re going back to New York…”  

Darcy sighed in relief. “Tony. I’m so glad you’re here. I’m mad at you, but I’m glad you’re here.”  

“I’m sorry, short stack. Who knew repairing two things at once would be a bad idea? I have no idea what Bruce’s teleporter does not, but I can bet it’s something  _ really _ cool like update his non-existent Facebook. C’mon, let’s get going before someone here asks me to help with something.”

“It’s the FBI, Tony. They’re pretty notorious for  _ not _ asking for help.” 

He rolled his eyes and stared at the two of them for a moment. “You want like… a minute to say goodbye?”  

“If you don’t mind…” Darcy said, pushing her hair back again. “This is kind of the first time we’ve met in person.”  

“What?” Stark looked between the two of them incredulously. “Haven’t you been talking for a year or something?”  

Darcy wrinkled her nose. “Creeper much, boss-man?”  

“Use the company computer for online flirting much, PR-woman?”  

“What happened to that minute?” she countered, hands on her hips.  

“It starts now,” he said, tapping his watch face and walking out of the room.  

She turned back to face Spencer, shrugging slightly. “Guess this is goodbye for now?”  

He opened his mouth, unsure of what to say. “You should… you should come down to DC to visit sometime.”  

“To visit the city or visit  _ you _ ? Because I went to the Smithsonian in high school. I’m set on that.”  

He smiled. “To visit me. Maybe take a plane next time, this… teleportation thing seems to need some work before it’s ready for humans.”  

She laughed. “Right? Good thing I’m Asgardian, right?”  

“Yes…” he agreed. “Wait. What?”  

“Kidding. I do  _ know _ some Asgardians though.”  

There were a few seconds of comfortable silence before he spoke again. “Will you? Come visit me?”  

“Of course. And feel free to look me up whenever you’re in New York, Spencer.”  

“I will.” 

“Fifty-nine Mississippi and sixty!” Tony called through the door.  

Darcy smirked and jutted her thumb over her shoulder. “I gotta go. Talk to ya later, Spence.”  

“Tonight?”  

“Yeah, tonight.” she replied, smiling as she left the room.


End file.
